I think I've identified a concerning trend with myself and my Chinese study that I'll call "life escape". Over the last year or so, I've been studying Chinese a ton, basically at the expense of all other productivity outside work. My typical night involves and hour or two of study, followed by watching Chinese and Taiwanese TV, listening to music, etc. On weekends, I might spend half the day doing this, the other half of my day doing the bare essential chores and that's it. I don't even game much anymore because the idea of pouring into a Chinese text or watching some sappy drama is way more immersive for me than gaming and getting nothing out of it.
I'm married, have a full time job, own a home, etc., and I'm starting to wonder if all the study really serves a purpose or if it's just an escape for me to get myself out of doing the types of things other people in my age bracket seem to do with their time before they have kids, like working toward an advanced degree or doing home improvement/beautification projects. I will probably never go back to China for an extended period of time, I have no career ambitions that involving using Chinese, yet day in and day out I'm drawn back to it and it's all I can think about when I'm not at work. It's also weird explaining to people why you spend so much time learning something "just because".
tl;dr: My life is fine and I'm relatively happy, I guess I'm just having some guilt over how much I spend learning Chinese, and angst over what I could ever do to make all this study more than just pure life escapism.
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